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2005-01-28
11:39 a.m.

I must have one of those faces that doesn’t seem friendly in a bar, but is very approachable on the street and on public transportation. I just don’t know how else to explain all the attention I’ve been getting from the homeless (or people appearing to be) lately.

I can stand around a bar for a couple of hours and not many people will talk to me, but when I step onto the street, the hobos are all up in my shit. Sure, they’re mostly just asking for money, but I also think that they really do care about my well-being.

I was walking near Wrigley Field the other day and had to go through some serious piles of snow and ice. I must not have looked so confident, because the homeless guy walking in the opposite direction took one look at me and shouted, “You’re about to fall on your ass!.” I’m sure that had I not been walking so fast, I would have heard him tell me to be careful.

And then there was the guy standing outside of the movie theater asking me to buy a homeless themed newspaper. I told him that I didn’t have any change but would hit him up on the way out. It was super cold that night, that I thought for sure that he wouldn’t still be outside. I was positive that he would’ve given up and gone home. That’s the thing about the homeless, though. They never go home. Of course he was still out there, so I had to give him a dollar. In return, not only did I get the newspaper, but also the biggest hug a stranger has ever given me.

Even today, on the train, some guy in gray sweat pants started randomly talking to me. He obviously didn’t know the unspoken rule of riding the train in silence. I don’t think he was homeless, though, just crazy.

It’s clear that I’m very approachable, now I just have to figure out a way to get the right people to approach me. I either need to work on a new, friendly bar face, or just start looking for bars full of crazy homeless people. Oh wait, those aren’t called bars, those are called shelters...