New Releases - Old Favorites - Bio - Cast Notes - Guestbook - Fan Mail - The Studio

2003-05-29
10:37 a.m.

So I have found myself in a relationship these last couple of weeks. I'm not really good at relationships, so this is all kind of new, I guess.

It's funny. I was telling someone just a week or so ago that I was really excited and happy about this relationship. I said that one of the things I liked about it was that it was just so easy.

It was like I jinxed myself. The minute that I said things were easy is when they stopped being so simple. Nothing major happened, but I just felt something in the relationship change. When that happens, it is so easy to try to push someone away. That's what I do. It's easier to push people away than to deal with what is really going on. I'm lazy that way, I suppose.

I have decided not to be so pushy this time. I'm working on it and it's not too hard. Relationships do not have to be difficult, but they do require some work. I'm just not used to that.

Speaking of being lazy. I have been having a real problem with that lately. I am just not hungry. There is no fire in my belly. A nap seems like a better idea than really going out there. I know my life will be full of great things and big things are going to happen to me. They will never occur, though, if I never do anything about them.

It's so easy to talk about things but I just need to strap one on and do really do them.

It's time to change that aspect about myself. No one will change it for me. I'm the only one.

I will like I am being vague. oh well. I know what I mean.