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2003-05-01
10:16 a.m.

I think old people really love me. They really do. Every time I am around the elderly, they are always smiling and laughing. I am sure that they think I am charming. Except for the cranky old people. They don't love anyone.

Last night, I was waiting tables, and I was serving a couple who will be considered elderly in a couple of years. They freaking loved me and talked my ear off the whole night. They told me that they were on the road and on their way to Chicago. When I told them that I would be in Chicago this weekend, they got so excited, as if we would hang out or meet for tea once I arrived in the city. Like that would ever happen. Those old people. They love me so much that I would've been a great guest star on "The Golden Girls."

I was watching "The Girls" (Golden, not Gilmore) last night, and I noticed that the episode I was watching originally aired in 1986. That was 17 years ago, right? I'm telling you, the episode looked like it could have been from just a couple of years ago.

That's the thing about old people. They never really look out of style. The fashion for them never ever changes. I'm thinking about designing a trendy fashion line for the old folks. It will be difficult, I know. I know what they think about change. Since they love me so much, though, how could the elderly ever say no to me?