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2003-07-15
7:04 p.m.

When I got on the ferry in Boston to come to Provincetown last week, I didn't realize that I was getting on board some sort of freaky time machine.

Provincetown is not a town of the past. It's pretty progressive in these parts. Look out the window and you will see members of the same sex holding hands! That was not shocking to me, though. What was shocking was the fact there are no corporations here. Yes, it is refreshing, but after awhile, I am sure all I will want is an order of chicken nuggets and biggie fries from Wendy's.

When I was unpacking last week, I realized that I forgot to bring some items, so I asked one of my roommates where the nearest Target was. He just laughed at me. I will not be able to enjoy the affordable discounts and pleasant shopping atmosphere at Target until November. The same goes for Urban Outfitters and MacDonald's. I have never been to a place where there wasn't a Starbucks every few feet. Do they even use green straws anymore? My thumb is no longer on the pulse of what's going on.

Also, for the first time ever I missed "Sex and the City" on Sunday. We have cable here, but no HBO in the house. This is the real reason I go out everynight. I'm trying to be best friends with the first person I meet who has HBO. I'm also trying to find out if the next door neighbors get the home box office. My roommate said he would splice their cable. We are calling our plan "Project OBH." It would be too obvious if we called it "Project HBO," you know?

Two more things to report... I drunkenly tried to convince a guy who works for Comedy Central to give me my own show. I don't think it'll happen this time considering that I never even told the guy my name. Also, Jonathon from "Who's the Boss" is staying here this summer. Looks like my life-long dream of meeting Tony Danza will be fulfilled afterall. If only it was 1987...